Sunday Suckiness

Here are my thoughts for this morning...warning, they are not happy-go-lucky-thoughts.

I'm no fun anymore. Honestly, I don't know if I was ever fun. I guess when I was a child and didn't know any better.

Generally, I don't enjoy going out. Sure, if I get out, I usually have an ok time, but getting me out is hard. I'm a homebody and . It's nice to get invites, but then it just makes me anxious. And when I say 'no', I feel bad. If I say 'yes', it's (most of the time, not always) out of guilt. It's a lose-lose situation. Now I expect to get zero invites out because of this...which of course, makes me a winner (sarcasm).

I feel that people enjoy themselves better when I'm not around.

I'm lonely, but I'm also a loner. The more time I spend at home, the more I realize I don't have someone. Sure, I have friends and that's great, but I tend to go through phases with them.  Then "get out of your house" right? Wrong. That's where the loner part comes in. I'd rather stay in than make the effort. So basically, I get what I get. I will forever be screwed

I say "I don't care" alot. It's become my newest trend. It's not your typical "where should we go eat?" "oh, I don't care" phrase. It's more along the lines of "oh, you really should be doing this" "I just don't care." It's the "I give up" phrase.


I judge people, knowing full well they, in turn, judge me for it. Someone has told me that judging is wrong. Well, I can't help it. It's like telling me to walk around in the dark, because I've had to turn off my 'judging switch' like you would turn off a light. How do I turn off my opinions? I try not to be vocal about it. It's more about observation. I've had to explain that there is good judging and bad judging, you know, like in the Olympics. Everyone gets rated on a scale of 1-10 or 1-100 depending on the sport and the best athletes get the best scores. I think the best people get the best scores and the worst, well, they don't do so well. I judge for

I speak my mind and often get hell for it. Heaven forbid I should actually say what I think, because when I do...I get looks (yup, you all judge me too) and arguments against what I say.

I'm tired of fighting. I fight with others and I fight internally.

I enjoy coaching. I actually LOVE it. However, I get grumpy when people don't put in the effort. If you say you are going to come out and work, then you should actually come out and put your money where your mouth is. Why should I work for you, if you aren't going to come out and give it your all? What's in it for me? I can't say I'm proud of you. I can't see you make forward strides. There are other things I could be doing for me...but I'm out there for you. USE ME or lose me. If you don't want to be there, you aren't worth my time.

Facebook makes me mad. Pinterest makes me happy.

I'm tired of excuses. Hearing them and making them.

I'm not an optomist. I'm a pessamist with a hint of realism. The glass is always half empty and the sun doesn't always come out tomorrow.

I'm probably considered clinically depressed. I've known that for years. I had one doctor tell me this, but I never went on medication for it. It comes and goes in waves and I'm currently in a low spot.

You're in Urinetown!

For those who aren't aware, the alumni of the Episcopal School of Dallas, myself included, put on a production (mainly musicals, but we hope to also expand into straight plays, etc) almost entirely produced, performed and built by former students at ESD.

Last summer, after a brief hiatus, the alumni musical returned to ESD with our production of THE 25TH ANNUAL PUTNAM COUNTY SPELLING BEE. With two performances, hours of rehearsal,

You can check out one of the reviews here: http://yourplano.dallasnews.com/2013/07/24/more-magical-than-his-foot-esd-alumni-musical-worthy-of-a-standing-ovation/?nclick_check=1

We officially announced yesterday that this summer's alumni musical will be Urinetown. We are actually quite thrilled about this.

We will be holing auditions in April (dates to be announced soon). You can always check out Facebook page (LIKE us @ESD Alumni Production) or on Twitter (follow us @ESDAlumProd).