Friday, February 7, 2014

I Could Write a Book

I know I've said this a number of times, but I mean it. I really could write a book. The experiences in theater are noteworthy, but when you are a Company Manager in said theaters, the experiences are often unbelievable and not always in a good way.

Artists are bizarre, to quote Stephen Sondheim's Sunday in the Park with George. Oh, I can attest to that.

I've worked in a number of regional theaters, a ballet company, summer stock and even an opera house. I've met an extraordinary number of people at every location I've worked. Each of these places compiled the resume that I now possess. But they also have provided me with stories that you would not believe or could even come up with in your wildest dreams.

I remember explaining some of the things that happened to my mother, who in turn told me, "Lauren, you need to write this down. You could write a book." As always, mom was right. I know other Company Managers across the country will agree...there is never a dull moment and you honestly don't know what will pop up next. (PS...CM's, I will want your stories too. It can be a compilation!)

So during my entire professional career I have kept notes. I've written down little details here and there. Notable interactions were accounted for; some more unbelievable than others. Some tame while others wildly fanciful. Each serving a purpose, unlikely as it may initially seem.

What I find fascinating is that most of these people don't feel that they are being odd, entitled, unheard of, etc. They find that this is natural and normal and everyone else does this as well. I don't have the heart to tell them (to their face) that no, normal people don't typically act this way.

Honestly, I love most of these artists. Yes, they've given me something to write about, but in most instances, they really are sweet and amazing people and after the initial shock of the requests, I'm usually able to take care of it and they become very grateful. There are a few that don't and nothing is ever enough, but I can't help that. I do my best and move on. Plus, most of the experiences leave me wondering...now what?

Would you like a few examples? Now, they won't seem innocuous at all because I'm leaving the context out, but ask me sometime for the full story and I think you would be amused and possibly stunned. Here are a few gems (in no particular order) that I will leave out the names for their protection (for now).
  • Juggling women
  • Rust stains in a toilet
  • Punches in the arm
  • No smoking within 100 feet
  • Aluminum foil on windows
  • Running for salt
  • Mailing ashes
  • "Someone slept in my bed"
  • Accidental stabbings and other injuries
...and SO MUCH MORE...

I'm looking forward to reliving some of these stories at the panel I'm sitting on at this year's USITT in Fort Worth entitled Company Management: Herding Cats (haha, no joke). Stop by and see me!

Now, back on topic, what did I get out of all of this you may ask? A phone full of people's numbers and memories to last a lifetime. I may not always like my job, but I can definitely say that it hasn't been boring.

So look for my bestseller in a bookstore near you. Just don't expect it anytime soon...at least not while most of these people are still alive. ;-)